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7 Steps to Effective Communication

by on Apr 10, 2013

Need Help With Communication?

Communication with your partner is not as easy as it seems. Without any formal education in the subject, couples are expected to have the ideas and the methods for communicating and resolving family conflicts. The solution lies in proper and effective communication. Here are the 7 steps to effective communication.

Every day, you communicate with someone in one form or another. There are many ways of communication like talking directly to the person, through a phone call or writing letters. Humans are social creatures which is why there is always a need for humans to communicate. It will be very hard to survive this world without communicating with others. It might just make you crazy, literally speaking.

In a relationship, effective communication is very important. A relationship is an effort between two partners. If there is a failure in communication, misunderstandings will easily arise. The lack of communication damages a relationship. It can lead to insecurities, quarrels, loss of interest, emotional dissatisfaction and lack of faith. Truly, a relationship is not easy to maintain. Since there are two different individuals in a relationship, there is a constant effort to meet in the middle.

Having healthy communication in a relationship is challenging too. Most women like to talk a lot while men prefer to keep silent. That common situation already shows the poor communication between couples.

Proper communication helps couples open up with each other. They can freely express their opinion and feelings. With communication, understanding is achieved which is a very important aspect in any relationship.

Healthy communication promotes respect, trust, security and confidence in a relationship. Open communication brings in positivity as both of you understand each other clearly. To give you a more detailed idea, here are some reasons why healthy communication is needed in a relationship:

Healthy communication builds trust.

When you talk to each other about your opinions, thoughts and emotions, the trust between the both of you starts to build up. This is because the other person develops a sense of concern and responsibility to try and understand you. Through communicating, the bond of trust solidifies. It also helps your partner feel more assured and secured as you tell him or her everything.

Healthy communication gives support to your partner.

In a relationship, both of you should help each other grow as individuals. That is the objective of a healthy relationship. The more you communicate with each other, the closer you will be. Hence, it will be easier to share the good and bad things in one’s life. If the person feels that he or she can communicate to you about anything, that person will feel a sense of support from you.

Healthy communication expresses love. Why do you try to communicate and understand each other? It is because you care and love that person. When there is love, you want your relationship to move ahead as both of you face problems together. With communication, you can tell your partner what you feel especially when you have a failed expectation. Keeping things to yourself does no good in a relationship. Often, it will just end up in fights as pent-up feelings explode. With proper communication, you get to assure your partner that you love, support and trust them completely.

Now that you know the major reasons why communicating properly is necessary in a relationship, you must learn more about how to communicate with your partner effectively. They key word here is effective communication where in the transfer of information is a success. How do you communicate with your partner?



Listening is different from hearing. When you listen, there is an effort to understand what the person is trying to say as opposed to hearing. In a relationship, fights will be unavoidable and this is the times where your listening skills will be tested. In the heat of an argument, both of you will try to speak up and make the other understand your point. However, the continuous barrage of words from each other does not help.

To effectively communicate, take the listening role first. Listen to what he or she has to say without interrupting even if small verbal attacks were said. Open your mind when listening so proper communication will follow.



When listening to your partner, give him or her your full attention. It will be hard to listen to your partner’s concerns if you are distracted. Turn off the radio or TV or stop doing what you are doing to listen. Your partner will greatly appreciate your effort to listen what he or she has to tell you. Plus, communication will be more effective if there is focus.



If there is something you need to talk about and there are friends and family around, make it a point to talk privately. Do not push the effort to talk when there are distractions around. It will be best to find an isolate and private location to talk to each other. This way, both of you can listen and speak properly without holding back or fear that others might hear you.



When communicating with each other, honesty should always be practiced. The point of talking to each other is to share each other’s concerns, sentiments and opinions. Honest communication results to effective communication. If you hold back, the process of communication will be failure. Honesty is always best in a relationship. Otherwise, the bond of trust might break.



If there is something that you don’t understand, make sure that you clarify with your partner. There are times when you will just want to get the argument done with so you don’t ask anymore. The whole point of communicating is to understand each other clearly and completely. If you are unsure about something, ask away. Surely, your partner will be glad to explain it again to you.

In order for both of you to communicate with each other, you must make time for each other. Yes, there might be a lot of things going on like your career, the children or other things. You have to learn to set aside time for both of you to talk things out. As clearly pointed out, effective communication is important to make a relationship work.