Need Relationship Advice?
Relationship advice is something that women are constantly looking for and constantly dispensing to their loved ones and friends. It might seem, even for the casual observer, that women are obsessed with relationship advice. But this fact just proves that women care more about the status of their relationship with their significant others, friends, and family members.
Women, in most societies, tend to be the source of warmth in the home or in certain relationships. But this kind of warmth does not naturally come to someone who is a Miss or Mrs.— it comes from personality. However, this kind of personality needs cultivation, and many women just do not have the time or the patience to grow a personality that will instantly improve and mend all the relationships they have in their lives.
But plenty of relationship advice borders on sheer sentimentality and romanticism —clearly culled from the biggest book of all things inspirational or movies written by the ultimate collaboration of Nicholas Sparks, Jude Deveraux, Judith McNaught, Nora Roberts, and the spirits of Jane Austen and Elizabeth Barrett Browning—clearly not the relationship advice for women who live ordinary lives in these ordinary times.
Whether you are a plain Jane, a powerbroker, or the heart of your home, all you need in terms of relationship advice is in the realm of the practical. You do not need a web of complications and tangled emotions in your life—the key to a happier life is a good set of practical relationship advice. And here is a couple of useful and practical relationship advice that you can use in the different relationships in your life.
PRACTICAL RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FOR YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER
If we were to compile all the relationship advice pertaining to the men in our lives, whether they are given to us or something that we have shared, the result would be voluminous enough to fill the entire Library of Congress. It is quite good that much relationship advice on improving the way we attract, keep, and break up with our men is not written down, or humanity will suffer from a serious lack of paper.
There are all types of relationship advice — for women who want to play the field, for women who want to be constantly surrounded with plenty of admirers, or for women who just wants to find the right man. No matter what we want for the meantime, most of us just want to be loved. You do not need any kind of fancy or super scientific relationship advice to find love.
We believe in a common sense approach when it comes to the relationship advice. Being yourself is a relationship advice that never gets old. As Oscar Wilde would say: "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken".
You do not want your man to be attracted to someone that you have just pretended to be. While pretending to be someone more compassionate, cooler, more intelligent and cultured, or even more demure might attract men in droves at the beginning, you might not be able to sustain this kind of charade in the long run. Your man might feel cheated, or worse, deceived.
Being yourself is not just a run of the mill relationship advice that you can find in inspirational books, romance novels, and women’s magazines. It is a sound relationship advice that you should remember when entering a relationship you want to be based on trust. It will be unfair for you to ask for anything without being honest upfront.
Plus, a façade is hard to maintain. You will find yourself trying too hard to keep up appearances, and this can be terribly stressful. You will not be able to enjoy the relationship on your own terms. And then there is the fact that good men are more attracted to women who are comfortable in their skin, women who listen to the most honest relationship advice there is: being yourself.
PLAY HARD TO GET
There are plenty of relationship advice experts give asking you to play hard to get, mainly because men are programmed for the chase and other biological mumbo jumbo like that. But if you are not the type that sits around waiting for things to happen in your love life, then disregard this “wise” relationship advice completely.
If the man you want in your life cannot accept you for who you are, and not just parts of you but the entire package, then no amount of romantic relationship advice can make your relationship a happy, healthy, and fulfilling one.
You do not need relationship advice that calls for playing mind games in order to keep men interested in you. As you grow older, you will realize that this kind of relationship advice is counterproductive. Your man will see right through it and eventually will be through with you.
When you already are in a relationship, do not expect that everything will turn out like your favorite romantic movie or your favorite romance novel. If you want your partner to accept you for who you are, then extend the same courtesy to him. No matter what relationship advice columnists say, you cannot change a person.
One of the worst reasons to get into a relationship is the hope to change your partner for the better—this is a delusion shared by thousands of women all over the world. Face the facts. Even if the best romance writer in the world wrote the relationship advice column that you are reading, you cannot really change someone who does not want to. The good qualities and the bad characteristics make your partner the person he is, and the best relationship advice for this is to accept him wholeheartedly, avoid trying to overlook or tolerate these negative qualities that you are not specially fond of; this might end up in resentment in your part.
You might also want to remember one invaluable relationship advice when you are in a fight with your partner: the time-out rule. Stop pursuing arguments—once you have exchanged hurtful words to each other, you might want to stop arguing altogether. This relationship advice will be hard to follow especially if you are in the heat of the moment. Take the time to cool down before talking again so you will not make a decision that you will regret right after you have brought it out in the open. Before breaking up after a rather nasty argument, take a day away from your partner to mull things over. Go for a nice long walk or sleep on it before making a decision that you cannot take back.
Practical relationship advice, such as the one we advocate, does not need to be overly romantic, psychological, or well thought of. The relationship advice that we dispense is meant to appeal to the common sense of the practical woman. But relationship advice dispensers should not only be limited to the romantic relationships—there are filial and platonic interactions in need of a good relationship advice.
RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FOR YOUR FAMILY
Not a lot of people try to seek relationship advice when it comes to problems with their family. They seem to closely heed the popular relationship advice and adage “you cannot choose family,” and therefore try to “accept” their family as they are. This “acceptance” is often not really wholehearted acceptance, but more of resignation.
The best relationship advice for family is true acceptance. Do not keep track of all the things that you have overlooked and tolerated in the past and bring them up whenever you want to make a certain family member feel guilty. This relationship advice also works for romantic relationships because nobody should be as resentful as to bring everything up every time there is an argument.
The second relationship advice that you should keep in mind is to really listen to your family members. Knowing them for most of your life or spending a long time living with them does not make you an expert in the things that they really want or hope to achieve. In any kind of filial relationship, really listening to what the other has to say or has brewing in his or her head is the most practical family relationship advice ever—communication is key to everything.
Ask any relationship advice expert and he or she will tell you that communication is a dialogue; nobody has to dominate the conversation all the time. Relationship advice experts will also tell you that effective communication might be the only relationship advice your family will ever need.
Another relationship advice to keep in mind is to be kind to your family members. Relationship advice experts will remark that kindness does not mean blind acceptance of wrong actions. And then there is also the valuable relationship advice of forgiveness. Forgive your family members about the wrongdoings they have committed in the past and move on from them.
Compromise is not something that the more obstinate and idealistic relationship advice “experts” will give you. But compromise is a very important relationship advice for the family—especially since you cannot really break up with them when things are not going well. Plus, you cannot expect to get your way all the time! Most relationship advice experts suggest that you find a middle ground where everyone can be happy.
RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FOR YOUR FRIENDS
Women need to have friendships with other women. Life is not limited to the relationships with a significant other and family members. And then there are the friendships that we maintain for work, and the relationships that we maintain to the friends of the people who are important in our lives.
Relationship advice is not only limited to the people we think we cannot live without. Seek relationship advice to better yourself for friendships we maintain, and these friendships can be complementary to the other kinds of relationships in our lives.
TREAT AS YOU WANT TO BE
The first relationship advice that you should remember when dealing with your friends is to treat them exactly how you want to be treated. Do you want to be respected and trusted in your relationship? Do you want your friends to always be there for you whenever you need them, whether you are happy or sad?
Relationship advice experts emphasize the importance of reciprocation in any kind of friendship. But this does not mean that you need to count all the good things and favors you do for your friends—you just want to make sure that no one is taking advantage of the other.
SPEND TIME TOGETHER
Another relationship advice for friends that we often overlook is the importance of spending a bit of time with them. There is no doubt that you are all busy with your own lives, but relationship advice experts see that a lot of friends have a falling out because they do not see each other as regularly as they would like. Your get-togethers do not need to be expensive week-long vacations. Just allot a couple of hours of your time to catch up with your friends, let them know that you are interested in the things happening to their lives, and offer your company and support whenever they need it.
Relationship advice is often free because we all think that we can be relationship advice experts in our own ways. You do not need a fancy degree in order to give relationship advice, but we need to assess the situation properly first. While we do not think that anyone has a monopoly on good relationship advice, do not force advice on anyone who does not explicitly ask for it. Giving unsolicited relationship advice is the leading cause of resentment in many relationships, even among family and friends. And if you are asked for your take and opinion on things, always remember our simple creed: go for practical advice that aims to simplify life, not complicate it and worsen the situation.