WHY DO MAJORITY OF COUPLES LIVE IN DENIAL, OPTIMISTICALLY BIASED?
Relationship expert, Diana Kirschner says: “We are very good about being in denial, pretending or thinking that everything’s fine when it really isn’t. And that is because everybody these days are too busy with work, children, parents, social life, staying in touch with people; and its easy to retract where your love relationship is. Its easy to get on an autopilot, assuming that everything is fine.” Dr. Kirschner had one client who was totally surprised that her husband just left her one day.
Most couples in general are very optimistic and enthusiastic about their relationship and they are in denial, another words, they are optimism biased. In the TED talk below, Tali Sharot, Ph.D. explains how we are born to be optimistic, as opposed to being realistic by sharing a research that suggests our brains are wired to look on the bright side -- and how that can be both dangerous and beneficial. This applies to our love life as well. People want to believe that nothing bad can happen to them, while being in constant state of denial. The theory “The secret to happiness is low expectations” has proven to be untrue. Watch the video to learn why: